Blade (1998) 20th Anniversary Review

Twenty years before “Black Panther”, Marvel partnered with New Line to release a black-led superhero movie which would see them help kick-start the current superhero boom as well as changing the course of their movie adaptations to that point. Born as his mother was dying from a vampire attack, Blade (Wesley Snipes) possesses all of … Continue reading Blade (1998) 20th Anniversary Review

Slaughterhouse Rulez (2018) Review

If Hammer House Of Horror had produced “Spaced”, the result could have been a lot like “Slaughterhouse Rulez”. A common room home brew of British Boarding School classics like “If….” and “Goodbye, Mr. Chips” (the 1969 version specifically) mixed with “Ghostbusters” and dash of “Harry Potter”, this intoxicatingly lowbrow comedy horror offers a novel spin … Continue reading Slaughterhouse Rulez (2018) Review

Overlord (2018) Review

In the build-up to D-Day, Private Boyce (Jovan Adepo) and Corporal Ford (Wyatt Russell) believe they’re the only survivors of an ill-fated paratrooper mission behind enemy lines to knock out a radar jamming post so the Allies can provide air support for the beach landings. They eventually meet up with a few more survivors of … Continue reading Overlord (2018) Review

Argento’s Dracula 3D (2012) Dractober Review

What better way to close out #Dractober than with a brand new interpretation of the legend of Bram Stoker’s celebrated vampire from the visionary director of “Suspiria”? Well, as it turns out, probably quite a few things. During the Walpurgis Night celebrations in the Carpathian village of Passo Borgo, a young couple sneak off into … Continue reading Argento’s Dracula 3D (2012) Dractober Review

Double Date (2017) #MonthOfSpooks Review

British comedy horror is a bit of a dicey prospect at the best of times. For every “Shaun Of The Dead” there are a dozen “Lesbian Vampire Slayers”, so when “Double Date” popped up on the old Sky Q box, I was wary but willing. Jim (Danny Morgan) is about to turn thirty and his … Continue reading Double Date (2017) #MonthOfSpooks Review

The Batman vs Dracula (2005) Dractober Review

“The Batman” is one animated incarnation of Batman which passed me by, but he seems to have been the only one I can find who tangled with the Prince Of Darkness himself. Walking a slightly darker path than the more kid-friendly TV series did, this feature-length direct-to-DVD spin-off features not only the title combatants but … Continue reading The Batman vs Dracula (2005) Dractober Review

Van Helsing (2004) Dractober Review

Universal have been trying to resurrect their Dark Universe for a lot longer than you may think. Back in 2004, emboldened by the quick one-two hits of “The Mummy” and “The Mummy Returns”, they decided to give director Stephen Sommers the whole Universal Monster toy box. Unfortunately, what he came up with was a textbook … Continue reading Van Helsing (2004) Dractober Review

Wes Craven Presents: Dracula 2000 (2001) Dractober Review

A reimagining before reimaginings were ‘cool’, “Dracula 2000” – released a mere nine days before the end of the year 2000 in America and therefore in 2001 everywhere else brings the myth of Dracula into the modern millennial age, without a smashed avocado or deconstructed cold-brew oat-milk latte in sight. When a group of thieves … Continue reading Wes Craven Presents: Dracula 2000 (2001) Dractober Review

Shadow Of The Vampire (2000) Dractober Review

A blackly comic metafictional account of the making of “Nosferatu”, positing the idea that F W Murnau was prepared to go to any lengths in order to capture his masterwork, even turning a blind eye to the real-life vampire he has found to ‘play’ Count Orlok. Supported by a great performance from John Malkovich as … Continue reading Shadow Of The Vampire (2000) Dractober Review

Dracula: Dead And Loving It (1995) Dractober Review

It may open with a Hammer-esque galloping horse and carriage but this Mel Brooks spoof has the whole Dracula oeuvre in its sights. From Lugosi to Coppola, Brooks and his co-writers leave no coffin unopened in the search for gags. A pity, then, that they found so few. When Renfield (a wildly overacting Peter MacNicol) … Continue reading Dracula: Dead And Loving It (1995) Dractober Review

Bram Stoker’s Dracula (1992) Dractober Review

Having secured the title rights to the name “Bram Stoker’s Dracula”, Francis Ford Coppola set out to bring his vision of the Dracula legend to unlife, the first straight ‘Dracula’ adaptation for thirteen years. Believing the fiancée of young solicitor Jonathan Harker (Keanu Reeves) to be the reincarnation of his dead wife, centuries-old Count Dracula … Continue reading Bram Stoker’s Dracula (1992) Dractober Review

Nosferatu The Vampyre (1979) Dractober Review

Initially, I accidentally started watching the German language version of this film (Herzog made two versions, one in German and one in English rather than use dubbing) but it took me a while to realise it such is the visual power of the movie. I’m pretty sure I could have continued to watch the film … Continue reading Nosferatu The Vampyre (1979) Dractober Review

Love At First Bite (1979) Dractober Review

There’s something inherently funny about the idea of an individual as famously permatanned as George Hamilton portraying the notoriously sun-shy Count Dracula but it’s not quite enough to lift this dated and lightweight comedy above the ordinary. Evicted from his ancestral Castle by the Communist government of Romania who plan to turn it into a … Continue reading Love At First Bite (1979) Dractober Review

Dracula (1979) Dractober Review

Back in 1979, Universal dusted off its back catalogue and made plans to make a feature film featuring Dracula for the first time since 1948. And they didn’t even think to wrap a whole shared universe around it, dark or otherwise. Ah, those were the days! Shipwrecked off Whitby, Count Dracula (Frank Langella), the apparent … Continue reading Dracula (1979) Dractober Review

Zoltan: Hound Of Dracula (1977) Dractober Review

This is a real dogs’ dinner of a Dracula movie. It would have been risible nonsense if it had been played for laughs as a comedy but as a deadly serious horror movie, it’s more dog’s egg than dog’s bollocks, and it owes its entire plot to the idea that Dracula once got so hungry, … Continue reading Zoltan: Hound Of Dracula (1977) Dractober Review

Halloween (2018) Review

Seeing as I first watched and reviewed the original 1978 “Halloween” for last year’s #MonthOfSpooks, it makes sense that I’d pick up this one for this year’s, especially as I still haven’t got around to seeing any of the other “Halloween” movies so this franchise timeline – the fifth so far – is the only … Continue reading Halloween (2018) Review

Andy Warhol’s Blood For Dracula (1975) Dractober Review

Those of you who prefer to refer to “The Witch” as “The VVitch” will be delighted to know that you can refer to this curate’s egg of a horror movie as “Blood For Dracvla” if you wish. Be warned, though, that may be the sole appeal of this pretentious, weirdly bucolic spin on the legend … Continue reading Andy Warhol’s Blood For Dracula (1975) Dractober Review

Goosebumps 2: Haunted Halloween #MonthOfSpooks Review

There’s no rest for the Tenacious as Jack Black finds himself back amongst the spooky goings-on, although this time around, it’s Slappy calling the shots. When Sonny (Jeremy Ray Taylor) and Sam (Caleel Harris) find a magic book that brings a ventriloquist’s dummy to life, their Halloween horror is only just beginning. The dummy is … Continue reading Goosebumps 2: Haunted Halloween #MonthOfSpooks Review

Vampira (1974) Dractober Review

Absolutely not a film to be judged by today’s neo-puritan standards, “Vampira” (released as "Old Dracula" in the US to cash in on the recent success of "Young Frankenstein") is steeped in the saucy, cheeky and, yes, casually racist and sexist humour of the early seventies but taken on its own terms, it has a … Continue reading Vampira (1974) Dractober Review

The Legend Of The 7 Golden Vampires (1974) Dractober Review

Devoid of their Dracula, Hammer House Of Horror cast around for something else to stake their vampire franchise to. I’m guessing screenwriter Don Houghton must have been listening to the radio in his office One can only imagine that the radio was playing in writer Don Houghton’s Bray Studios office as he contemplated a blank … Continue reading The Legend Of The 7 Golden Vampires (1974) Dractober Review

Bram Stoker’s Dracula (1974) Dractober Review

There's a whole generation of film fans for whom Jack Palance is either Curly Washburn from “City Slickers” (and, to a lesser extent Duke Washburn from “City Slickers II: The Legend Of Curly's Gold”) or the excessively nasal-breathy Carl Grissom in Tim Burton's Batman and although he may seem something of an odd pick for … Continue reading Bram Stoker’s Dracula (1974) Dractober Review

The Satanic Rites Of Dracula (1973) Dractober Review

We start out where “Dracula A.D. 1972” ended: with terrible music. This time, though, it actually sort of fits because “The Satanic Rites Of Dracula” actually is a cheesy seventies spy thriller of sorts. When a secret agent barely escapes from a secretive country house where he witnesses a satanic ritual in progress, he uses … Continue reading The Satanic Rites Of Dracula (1973) Dractober Review

Dracula A.D. 1972 (1972) Dractober Review

After being shot, stabbed, electrocuted by lightning, set on fire and thrown off a cliff, Dracula apparently got better because we now return to an exciting horse-drawn carriage chase already in progress. The year is 1872 and we’re a hundred years too early for the film you were expecting. Luckily, we’re just in time for … Continue reading Dracula A.D. 1972 (1972) Dractober Review

Blacula (1972) Dractober Review

Approaching this, I expected an uncomfortable relic, a tastless punchline to a joke that’s long since worn out its welcome, so it came as a pleasant surprise that, despite its Blaxploitation anachronisms, it’s actually a pretty solid vampire flick in its own right. In 1780, a massively racist Dracula welcomes an African prince and his … Continue reading Blacula (1972) Dractober Review

Dracula vs Frankenstein (1971) Dractober Review

With the aesthetics of a cheap seventies porno and the production values of an even cheaper seventies porno, Starting life as a biker gang movie before being having Frankenstein’s monster add and then finally having Dracula added as an afterthought in footage shot years later, “Dracula vs Frankenstein” is an even more patched together mongrel … Continue reading Dracula vs Frankenstein (1971) Dractober Review

The Witches Of Eastwick (1987) #MonthOfSpooks Review

Loosely based on the John Updike novel of the same name, George Miller’s sly satire of the gender wars brings a dusting of dark magic to the hollow lives of a sleepy New England town of Eastwick. Alexandra (Cher), Jane (Susan Sarandon) and Sukie (Michelle Pfeiffer) are close friends who support each other through the … Continue reading The Witches Of Eastwick (1987) #MonthOfSpooks Review

Countess Dracula (1971) Dractober Review

Wait a minute! This movie isn't about Dracula. It’s not even about a ‘real’ vampire. I shall have to complain to the Dractober planning department about this one. Oh well, as we’re here, we might as well delve into this story of black magic and court intrigue based on the 16th century Hungarian Countess Erzsebet … Continue reading Countess Dracula (1971) Dractober Review

Scars Of Dracula (1970) Dractober Review

Awakened by a bat vomiting blood onto his desiccated remains (we've all had nights like that, right?), Dracula (Christopher Lee) returns to life, back in his castle and ready to take in the local nightlife. Outraged at the Count’s tendency to nibble his way through their town’s young women, the men of the village rise … Continue reading Scars Of Dracula (1970) Dractober Review

Taste The Blood Of Dracula (1970) Dractober Review

Pity poor Dracula (Christopher Lee)! Last time we saw the contentious Count, he’d been impaled on a golden crucifix but as if that wasn't indignity enough, it turns out his demise – into a pile of rust-coloured dust – was witnessed by Weller (Roy Kinnear), a travelling salesman who was hurled from his coach by … Continue reading Taste The Blood Of Dracula (1970) Dractober Review

Dracula Has Risen From The Grave (1968) Dractober Review

Actually, Dracula has defrosted from the freezer and he conspicuously has a reflection at a key early point in the movie, but they’re minor grumbles as Lee thaws out old fang face and Hammer horror really start to make the character their own. We’ve crept into the early 20th century and but we’re still in … Continue reading Dracula Has Risen From The Grave (1968) Dractober Review

Addams Family Values (1993) #MonthOfSpooks Review

Picking up from the end stinger of “The Addams Family”, “Addams Family Values” sets out to expand the Addams clan with the addition of a new baby and all that a new arrival entails, with a suitably impious twist, of course. After several of Wednesday and Pugsley's failed attempts to murder the new baby, Gomez … Continue reading Addams Family Values (1993) #MonthOfSpooks Review

Dracula: Prince Of Darkness (1966) Dractober Review

Previously on Dracula... Having thoroughly bested the Count in his own library, Van Helsing (Peter Cushing) takes his leave of Castle Dracula and ten years go past (because we’re ignoring the Dracula-less “Brides Of Dracula”. The locals still cling to their fear of vampires and Father Sandor (the excellent Andrew Keir) prevents them from disposing … Continue reading Dracula: Prince Of Darkness (1966) Dractober Review

Billy The Kid Vs Dracula (1966) Dractober Review

Over a quarter of a century before SyFy transformed high concept into low art, prolific Hollywood director was churning out such mash-ups as “Billy The Kid vs Frankenstein’s Daughter” and “Billy The Kid vs Dracula”. In fact, those two would turn out to be the final feature films he directed, capping off a career which … Continue reading Billy The Kid Vs Dracula (1966) Dractober Review

Dracula (1958) Dractober Review

Hammer Films brought Dracula bang up to date by going back to the story’s roots, adapting Stoker’s novel – with a few twists – and bringing the famed Count back to life in all his technicolour glory. When Jonathan Harker (John Van Eyssen) accepts a position as Librarian at Count Dracula’s castle, his subterfuge is … Continue reading Dracula (1958) Dractober Review

House Of Dracula (1945) Dractober Review

Last seen getting all skeletal over his coffin on a roadside knoll, Drac’s back and in rude health, although that doesn’t mean he doesn’t want to consult his physician... Count Dracula (Carradine), posing as Baron Latos (a step up, at least, from Count Alucard) arrives in Visaria to visit the castle home of Dr Franz … Continue reading House Of Dracula (1945) Dractober Review

The Addams Family (1991) #MonthOfSpooks Review

Beset by production difficulties, it’s a wonder that “The Addams Family” movie exists at all. The fact that it’s great is a minor miracle. Marking Barry Sonnenfeld’s directorial debut after Tim Burton passed on the chance to helm this big screen reboot. Famously creepy and kooky, mysterious and spooky, the movie takes the twisted gothic, … Continue reading The Addams Family (1991) #MonthOfSpooks Review

House Of Frankenstein (1944) Dractober Review

The “Infinity War” of its day, “House Of Frankenstein” – also featuring Boris Karloff’s very last role in the Universal Monster Universe – brought together the tangled continuities of their “Frankenstein” “Wolf Man” and “Dracula” franchises into one big monster mash-up (it was originally going to feature “The Mummy” too but the budget just wouldn’t … Continue reading House Of Frankenstein (1944) Dractober Review

Son Of Dracula (1943) Dractober Review

Dractober’s keeping it in the family as we follow up “Dracula’s Daughter” with another story in a filial vein. Swapping the mountains of Carpathia for the swamps of the Deep South, Count Alucard (Lon Chaney Jr) arrives to visit Dark Oaks, the plantation owned by the wealthy Colonel Caldwell (George Irving) and his two daughters, … Continue reading Son Of Dracula (1943) Dractober Review

Dracula’s Daughter (1936) Dractober Review

Two days into Dractober, and we’re still waiting for the man himself to appear. Picking up exactly where “Dracula” (1931) left off, “Dracula’s Daughter” sees the mysterious Countess Marya Zaleska (Gloria Holden) seek out the assistance of Dr Jeffrey Garth (Otto Kruger) to cure her of the curse of vampirism, bequeathed to her by the … Continue reading Dracula’s Daughter (1936) Dractober Review

The House With The Clock In Its Walls (2018) #MonthOfSpooks Review

An unexpectedly family-friendly detour from gore-meister Eli Roth, the spookiest thing about “The House With A Clock In Its Walls” is that there’s a Jack Black-starring “Goosebumps” sequel coming out this year and this isn’t it. Instead, it’s an adaptation of the novel by John Bellairs telling the story of  Lewis Barnavelt (Owen Vaccaro) who, … Continue reading The House With The Clock In Its Walls (2018) #MonthOfSpooks Review

Nosferatu (1922) Dractober Review

A landmark of cinema, a touchstone of German expressionism and one of the oldest surviving horror movies ever made, F W Murnau’s “Nosferatu” may not terrify as it once must have done but it still mesmerises thanks to Murnau’s stunning use of light and shade and Max Schreck’s instantly iconic Count Orlok. When mysterious Transylvanian … Continue reading Nosferatu (1922) Dractober Review

The Predator (2018) Review

The Predator franchise hasn’t had as much bad luck as its studio stablemate the Alien. Sure they both clashed in a pair of adequate/ terrible movies but at least our favourite extra-terrestrial trophy hunter hasn’t appeared in anything as aggressively stupid as “Alien: Covenant”...until now, that is. When a renegade Predator crashes to Earth, hotly … Continue reading The Predator (2018) Review

The Nun (2018) Review

I seem to be getting into the habit of watching horror movies at the cinema, so when the fifth instalment of arguably the 21st century’s second most successful cinematic universe gave me an opportunity to start the story in chronological order (I haven’t yet seen any of the Conjuring movies or spin-offs, it was time … Continue reading The Nun (2018) Review

BlacKkKlansman (2018) Review

There’s a deep-rooted discomfort at the heart of “BlacKkKlansman” and it’s the fact that instead of being a historical, true story poking cautionary fun at the ignorance of the past, it instead feels like a howl of furious irony at the recidivism of modern-day America. In 1979, Ron Stallworth (John David Washington), Colorado Springs’ first … Continue reading BlacKkKlansman (2018) Review

Slender Man (2018) Review

It’s not easy to ignore how crass and tasteless this film feels given the real-life incident which the infamous internet phenomenon gave rise to. It’s even harder when, with the release of this film, the creepypasta meme is now responsible for yet another real-life atrocity. In a small Massachusetts town, four friends decide to summon … Continue reading Slender Man (2018) Review

The Last Sharknado: It’s About Time (2018) #SharkWeak2 Review

So it’s come to this: The Last Sharknado. Can I get that in writing? Me and the Sharknado films have had quite the trajectory. At first I was like: ‘this is a joke’. Then I was like, ‘No, seriously, is this a joke?’ And then I was like ‘okay, that was actually pretty funny’ followed … Continue reading The Last Sharknado: It’s About Time (2018) #SharkWeak2 Review

House Shark (2017) #SharkWeak2 Review

Once in a while, you come across a film which completely upends any assumptions or expectations you have. As I crawl wearily to the end of this far too long stretch of bad shark movies for #SharkWeak2, “House Shark” has done just that. It may be a cheap, nonsensical under-funded Indiegogo project but it’s also … Continue reading House Shark (2017) #SharkWeak2 Review

Empire Of The Sharks (2017) #SharkWeak2 Review

“Empire Of The Sharks” scores an early win with a mention of ‘trained ninja sharks’, a formidable weapon on a post-apocalyptic, flooded ecosystem. A biosphere covered entirely in water. An oceanic globe. An aquatic planet. Hmm. If only there was an easy way of saying it... On a future earth where 98% of the surface … Continue reading Empire Of The Sharks (2017) #SharkWeak2 Review

5-Headed Shark Attack (2017) #SharkWeak2 Review

The latest entry in the polycephalic Carcharodon carry-on opens with a decidedly mono-mouthed shark swimming through the ocean. *rings trade descriptions* Oh wait, it's a fake-out. It’s actually just a regular great white; a snack for the real monster... *starts to put phone down* ...which has four heads??? *snatches up phone again* Once again, the … Continue reading 5-Headed Shark Attack (2017) #SharkWeak2 Review

Shark Exorcist (2016) #SharkWeak2 Review

This weird, excruciatingly badly made movie opens on a nun walking through a graveyard while a newscast voiceover reports a local nun accused of murdering and torturing thirteen local boys and girls. It’s one of a number of things the movie talks about but never shows us. But given the quality of what it does … Continue reading Shark Exorcist (2016) #SharkWeak2 Review